Saturday, January 15, 2011

Not Today

I had a deep, thoughtful post half-written for today.

I had a plan: I was going to finish it up, polish it up and send it out into the world mid-day while my husband took the boys off to see the supposedly execrable but male-bonding worthy "Green Hornet" movie (I hear many things blow up for absolutely no reason).

But this is not to be.

At 5:55 this morning Ethan tiptoed into my room.  His stomach was hurting him, and he was feeling really crappy again.  He didn't quite throw up, but almost.

And?  As as added bonus?  All the commotion woke up his brother, Jacob, too.

And you know how well they get along.

And Jacob this morning is in a wonderful, joyous bouncy mood.  Which means he literally will not stop talking.

Not even for 15 seconds.

About the same things: Batman and the upcoming movie schedule.

Since 6 AM.

And when Ethan yells at Jacob to "just. shut. up!" I scold him.

But in my head?  I'm yelling it, too.  And then feeling guilty.


And?  Yesterday was my first day really back in the world.  I took Ethan to school in the morning.  I went to the doctor for my post-surgical check-up appointment.

(He removed the wound dressing, I got to see the stitches in my belly button. Yes I still have one. Allayed my fears that had sprung up when I read an account of a laproscopy gone terribly wrong with the poor woman ending up with a navel-less belly like a classic Barbie.)

I even actually went on a date with my husband for the first time in a month.  We kept it short and simple.  I figured sitting in a movie theater was pretty much the same as sitting on my sofa.  So we saw True Grit.  Really enjoyed it.

But by the end?  I was really hurting.  I'd conveniently forgotten that I don't actually SIT on the sofa, I LIE on it.  And sitting up engages the abdominal muscles.  Two hours of that?  Too long for me right now.  Damn.

Once again I'd let my ambitions get the better of me.  Feeling a little better didn't mean all better.  And today I'm paying the price for over-doing it yesterday.

And yes, I have a sense of perspective.  I know these are small bumps in the road, minor disturbances.

My husband will take Jake to the movies.

And Ethan may perk up later today, feel better and go off to his scheduled play-date with his best friend while my husband takes Jake off to his beloved basketball program.

But I also know that what I will be doing if I get a moment to myself is sleeping, being horizontal, non-abdominal-muscle-engagingly prone.

Healing my body.  Not writing.

Another day.

Not this one. 

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