Monday, January 14, 2013

A matched set of broken hips

I got the phone call at 4 AM, either late Friday night or early Saturday morning, depending on how you count time.

The BEST news a 4 AM phone call can deliver is a drunken wrong number. NO Candice is NOT here and (to my knowledge) she did NOT steal your man.

But this wasn't that.

This was the other thing. 

The "your mom fell and is in a world of pain so we've called an ambulance and are sending her to the ER" thing.

And so it goes... again.

I did not see my children on Saturday, leaving long before they were up for the day and retuning home long after they were asleep; Ethan in my own bed, missing me.

By the time I arrived at the ER my mother had been to x-ray and returned with the tech's unofficial "broken hip" reading, that soon became official. Her right side, this time. So now she has a matched pair.

There will be days ahead of back and forth on trains and in cars. There will be packed bags and sleepovers on Long Island friends' and relatives' sofas.

There may be an operation, or there may not.

This will be swift or long and drawn out.

There is no way my mother is getting away clean, without pain and suffering.

And that sound you hear?

Like crystal, cracked; musical and violent all at once?

It's the sound of my heart breaking.



  1. Ach...such a painful journey for your family. Praying for a r'fuah sh'leimah for your mom.

  2. So sorry, Varda, for the pain your mother is in, and for the resulting pain that your heart feels. Sending love and healing thoughts in your direction.

  3. I was just writing about an elderly relative's broken hip the other day. So sorry this is happening again.

  4. I wish I had more to say than I'm sorry, but I am so genuinely sorry your mom (and you) are going through this (again, dammit.)

  5. Oh Varda, I'm so sorry. I was thinking of you all day on Saturday. If you need anything just reach out, even it it's just someone to vent to, talk to, curse at. I'm here.
    sending you love...and hugs for you and your beautiful mom.

  6. I'm so sorry, I can't believe she (and all of you) have to go through this again. . . .

  7. Oh, I'm so sorry. My husband and I have been part of the sandwich generation for 17 years now. First we took care of my mother, now both of his parents. We've been on the receiving end of that call, too. His parents are in different nursing homes in different cities despite being married.

    Take one moment at a time.

  8. Life can be so cruel in its ability to push us back under just when we've kicked and fought our way to the surface. I'm thinking of you and sending you peace and strength. I'm so sorry that your mother is hurting.

  9. I'm sorry she has to bear this pain. And, I'm sorry for your pain too.


I am so sorry to have to turn word verification back on, but the spam-bots have found me - yikes!