Friday, January 6, 2012

Go (the F) to sleep, Ethan.

Ethan was talky, talky, talky tonight at bedtime.



The gems:

E: You know what, Mom?

Me: Ethan, it's very late, you're going to be tired and cranky in the morning. Go to sleep now.

E: Know what I love the most? Life! Being alive!

Me: That's great! I'm glad you feel that way.

E: Know what the best thing in the world is?

Me: Go to sleep, Ethan.

E: Getting to be alive.

Me: OK, Ethan that's a great feeling, now stop talking and go to sleep.

E: Want to hear a great tongue tickler word?

Me: No, I want...

E: Zucchini! Isn't that a great word? I love tongue ticklers.

Me: Ethan, talking is keeping you awake. Stop talking, lie still and you will fall asleep.

E: But what would happen if someone tried to REALLY tickle your tongue, like stick their hand in your mouth and...

Me: Tongues aren't actually ticklish, Ethan they're... STOP we are not having a discussion, you are going to sleep.

E: But what about...

Me: No but. Stop. Go to sleep.

E: So is Tigerclaw really all bad or is there still some good in him?

(Yes, he's just started reading the Warriors series. Months of confusing, similar sounding cat-character names lie in my future.)

Me: You'll find out yourself, as you read. You're not roping me into book talk. Shhh. Sleep.

E: But do you think...

Me: Shhhhh.

E: Mooooom, I was in the middle of saying something!

Me: Yes, and that's the problem. You cannot talk and sleep at the same time.

E: But I'm not sleepy, and I WANT to talk!

(lightbulb going on over the mother's head)

Me: You miss Dad, don't you? 

E: Yes, I do, I really do! (big sniffle) I just feel so sad that he's not here and it's going to be days and days before he comes back home. I wish we could just instantaneously transport ourselves to Seattle so he could kiss me goodnight.

Me: Me too, honey, me too. I keep thinking he's about to walk in the door at any minute, then I remember he's on a trip. We'll call him tomorrow, OK?

E: OK, Mom.

(forehead kiss)

Me: Sleep now, babe.

E: I love you, you're the best mom in the whole world. For me that is. I'm sure everyone else thinks their mom is the best, too.

Me: I love you, too, kid. Now, no more words, REALLY. Time. For. Sleep.

(2 minutes later, cue light snoring)

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